Friday, March 02, 2012

Playing It Safe


“If you love someone, tell him or her. Forget about the rules or the fear of looking ridiculous.  What is truly ridiculous is passing up on an opportunity to tell someone that your heart is invested in him or her.”
~ unknown


My initial reaction upon reading this was, “Hey, yeah, go for it, Beth.  What have you got to lose?” followed immediately by, “Uh-uh.  No way.  You have plenty to lose.”

Although my second thoughts are in part due to being wary, I’m going to credit maturity & common sense.  I think the older you get, the risks get riskier in that you have less time to recover from possible damage.  Life may throw you some curve balls but there are some you can dodge - where you possess some degree of control.

I’ve had my fair share of not-so-great moments this past while and I’m reluctant to invite the possibility of more into my life.  (And that possibility looms large in this particular scenario.)  More importantly, I’m happy now.  Could I be happier?  Possibly.  But why risk the happiness I now have? 

Call me a wimp or a coward – I’m okay with that.  I admit, I do care about rules.  Not all rules are made to be broken.  However, I’m not afraid of looking ridiculous (I’ve certainly done it often enough in other aspects of my life) and I doubt I would in this situation.  Well, maybe I am afraid…just a bit…  I no longer trust in matters of (my own) heart. 

So, I’m going with the nay-saying part of my brain - but who knows?  Perhaps other less complicated & more promising opportunities may come my way and I’ll be more inclined to take a risk.  For now, I’d rather play it safe than sorry – and keep on smiling…



15 comments:

Sherry said...

Risk. It's a somewhat daunting word. There is the weighing of what you have vs. what you might or might not have. It's all in the timing. And when the time is right, you'll know.

Gorilla Bananas said...

I believe you could have proposed to him on 29th February without breaking the rules.

Trish said...

Yup, that's the way I feel about risk nowadays too. Throwing caution to the wind is something young people like to do, and indeed should do. But me? At my age? Ehn - I'd like to protect what's left of my heart and soul. You're so right when you say 'have less time to recover'. I never thought of it that way but it's true.

I think you're wise to be wary. Maturity and common sense are wonderful things, aren't they? Happiness is being at peace.

Psychgrad said...

I think you can look at it from another perspective. Rather than seeing risk as something to avoid because of having less time to recover, you could think of it as less time to waste being fearful.

nursemyra said...

I value the happiness in the now

laughingwolf said...

with 'advanced age' also comes 'illness and/or sooner death', along with [sometimes] 'maturity and common sense'...

brings up another dilemma: do i want a chance at 5-30 years of a 'possible better life', or 5-30 years of the 'status quo', and 'regretting the might've been'?

decisions, decisions...

welcome to the race... the human one....

laughingwolf said...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RfwGkplB_sY

Zhu said...

People like to advocate taking risks but few actually stand by their words. It's always easier to encourage others to do so!

You know yourself best. If you think it's not worth it, don't do it. Commonsense still prevails.

Beth said...

Sherry:
Agreed – if the timing (and conditions) were right, I’d have no hesitation.

GB:
Talk about taking a risk!
I did think of doing that to someone else (as a joke) but thought it might scare him ;)

Trish:
“I'd like to protect what's left of my heart and soul.” Well put.
And I do enjoy my peace…

Psychgrad:
Good point but I think my fear is worth “listening” to in this particular case.

nursemyra:
So do I. :)

LW:
No regrets – made my decision and feel better for it.
That is one sad (and cautionary) video. I always say “Hello.” :)

Zhu:
Right you are – easy to say, not so easy to do.
And I do know myself – it’s not worth the risk.

Beth said...

Anonymous:
You’re still young – and should avoid the “what ifs” in life.

(p.s. anonymous comments don’t show up in the comments section – just in my email – interesting…)

Cipriano said...

There is nothing wimpy or cowardly in being wise, regarding issues involving love. With no other area of our being are we more vulnerable to subsequent disillusionment, or non-reciprocation.
And yet, we cannot experience what real love is [with another person] aside from that vulnerability aspect.
I'm not a big advocate of what is known as "thinking with the heart" if it means the brain is disengaged.
However -- another thing to mention is -- I'm single!

Beth said...

Cip:
No more disengagement of the brain for me!
As for being single (as in, not married) I’ve re-discovered the joys of being a “Ms./Miss.” :)

laughingwolf said...

prine is still an excellent storyteller, thru his songs/humor... check him out on youtube and elsewhere :)

Anonymous said...

Dear Beth,

Someone once said to me that if you ever have a chance to say something nice to someone, DO IT. That chance may never come up again, and it may be the one thing that makes an enormous difference in someone's life.
I always try to, and in the end it pays off, way more than it could ever be perceived as a risk. Food for thought.
Nomad

Anonymous said...

The only time it is a risk is if something is expected in return. LOVE, just for LOVE's sake, is always welcome....

Nomad