Thursday, December 20, 2007

Just So You Know...

Okay, so remember my very recent post where I (rather condescendingly) reminded everyone to smile at this festive, joyous time of year?

Well, the other day while out Christmas shopping I yelled at someone who cut me off in a crowded parking lot. Granted, I did so within the confines of my car but this what I yelled: “You dumb f**k!”

Yup. That came right out of my mouth.

Kind of surprised me. Momentarily.

That is the Beth who is so rarely revealed on this blog.

I may lose some readers over this revelation. So be it.

If you’re here to visit Saint Beth, she’s an illusion. Doesn’t exist.

Oh, and after I yelled? I smiled.

25 comments:

Rebecca said...

That is so funny. Last week, an elderly lady nearly ploughed into me (visibly pregnant lady) on her way to the escalators in a subway station. She screamed "MOVE!"

And I shouted back, "YOU MOVE... YOU F*CKER!"

And then I laughed. I couldn't believe I had said that.

Happy Holidays!

oreneta said...

My children learn the best vocabulary from me when I am driving, my oh my....I am not sure I would have smiled, maybe, but I am not sure.

Tra lalalala la la la la

Beth said...

rebecca:
Good for you! I remember having to stand on buses and subways when I was pregnant - as in 8 months pregnant! She deserved it.
Surprising what can come out of our mouths, right?
Peace and Joy to you!

oreneta:
Hey, I wasn't smiling at that jerk - I smiled because I was remembering my advice to offer smiles to strangers and then I ended up cursing!

Anonymous said...

Good for you!, sometimes ya just have to say it!

The Guy Who Writes This said...

"Oh, and after I yelled? I smiled."

You are Canadian, after all...

PG said...

Good for you! I do most of my best swearing while behind the wheel.

Gary said...

Go Beth go! We all know that you're also discreet, well versed and polite.

But sometimes it just has to come out!

Jen said...

God bless the saints, but I don't think they're the type I would want to have a glass of wine with at a book club.

So glad you're not one!

The Author Of This said...

Good one!

I think that if I removed all the swear words from my vocabulary, my sentences would be substantially shorter!

Mrs. G. said...

I think you overestimate the civility of your f*cking readers.

Go Beth.

megan said...

Oh my God, if it comes as a surprise to your readers that you can actually utter the fuck word, then they have no idea who you really are.............embrace it; it's a genetic thing...

Beth said...

rodney:
And sometimes it just slips out...

guy:
Yeah, can't even curse someone out without becoming cheery and polite right afterward. But, man, I was fierce!

psychgrad:
I regret to say I've been known to curse outside the confines of a car...

gary:
Oh, it has to and it does!

jen m.:
I take it you're no saint either. Good. Another kindred blog soul.

AMC:
Praise from a master!
Your posts would be shorter, too - but less fun to read.

mrs.g:
And not only are you one of my favourite f*cking readers, but your blog kicks *ss!

Sherry said...

Woo hoo Beth...this is the "I'm a real person too" Beth. We love you even when you yell out in the privacy of your own car, with a huge grin on your face afterwards. If anyone stops reading your blog because of that I would have to give my head a serious shake. I would like to meet the person who has never yelled at another driver, never honked a horn, never been stymied by another driver's inconsiderate and often dangerous behaviour. I've been that driver at times..the one who inadvertently cut someone off...I think we've all been on both sides of that glass.

Now ho bloody ho, go have glass of wine!!! :)

Sherry said...

LOL at "Guy"...'tis true, we do this. I even apologize when I bump into inanimate objects!!!

Beth said...

megan:
They do now! After just over a year of blogging...
So this is genetic too, huh?
We're doomed.

sherry:
Who me? Inadvertently cut someone off? Hey, maybe that explains those shaking fists and muffled shouts I see and hear while driving.
And thanks for loving me just the way I am. (I think there's a song in there somewhere...)

Anonymous said...

I think I know a person just like you!! She has been coming out more and more frequently lately, and always has a big smile on her face too! God it feels good to vent!! Hannah wants me to put a quarter in a jar every time I say a word that is "inappropriate." She gets upset. I can't tell you how much money I own that jar!XOXO

debra said...

Glad to have found your site, Beth.
Cheers!

Barrie said...

Beth, you are very entertaining!

Princess Pointful said...

I doubt anyone would stop reading after such delicious revelations. Remember, I like Beth's dark alter-ego! She's spicy!

Beth said...

eileen:
"Nice and sweet" is all well and good - and I know you are. But that other part of us needs to be let out too - and it does feel good. Fill that jar. When it's full, buy something for yourself!

debra:
Nice of you to say so - thanks for visiting. Cheers to you, too!

barrie:
I like to think so! ;)

princess pointful:
Yes, and with all this "spice" I've been invited to join THE TOUR!
(I'm also going to need a larger hat size.)

Beth said...

Princess Pointful:
That last sentence of mine makes no sense with this post - I'm referring to the comment you left on the previous post! (It's very early in the morning here - too early....)

Shari said...

Heth, spoken like a true human.
Sometimes we just blow off steam. (SHHH, even I have been known to slip in an occasional #*%(#@@!! Very rare. The last few days I was a pressure cooker. LOL.

And, it always comes out when I am frustrated. I don't say words like that casually.

You didn't lose this reader. :) Your'e human, after all.

Anonymous said...

haha, that's funny how the holidays bring out the cheer in all of us.
I do the same thing everyday but it's usually from the passenger seat and then I follow it up with a peace sign. Next time I am going to smile at the person though as well. F&*^kers.
Merry Christmas Everyone :)

Beth said...

shari:
Mad, frustrated, just plain old ticked off - it happens.
Glad the pressure is off for you now (or at least one pressure...).

apryl:
Good for you, kiddo! And I think the peace sign is a nice touch.
Merry Christmas to you!

Cipriano said...

Beth:
And here I always thought of you as being so * * * *in' demure and stuff.
Hey, the other day I had quite the incident. The laundry door got locked BEFORE ten o'clock, and I was down there at five to ten, and the damn thing was locked. I stormed back up to my place and called the Superintendent emergency phone and FREAKED on the guy.
He called back in a few minutes, telling me he is going to play my expletive-filled message to the management of the building while I shouted back to him a few names of stores where he could maybe go and buy a * * * *in' WATCH and stuff.... oh, it was wonderfully horrible.
Then I took off for holidays.
So, I am not sure if an eviction notice will be on my door when I get back!
Perhaps Jack's head will be in my bed, like the Mafia does it!
All the same, Merry Christmas to you, you CrazyWoman.