Thursday, December 13, 2007

Dear Santa

This is what I want for Christmas:

Okay, I would settle for this:

Because as a little girl when I asked (prayed) for a dollhouse from Santa, I got this:

Are you trying to figure out what that is? It’s my (pitiful) sketch of a circular BUNGALOW dollhouse. I have no artistic talent at all - which is painfully obvious. I can’t (or won’t) tell you the number of sketches I drew before settling on this pathetic one. Trust me. It’s the best I can do.

Anyway, I would have spared you my art work but I COULD NOT find an image of a BUNGALOW dollhouse anywhere.

And the reason for that? My guess is – they don’t exist. They weren’t a hit back then and never became one. Production must have stopped after such abysmal sales that year.

Imagine my devastation Christmas morning. Obviously, Santa (a.k.a. my parents) had no comprehension as to how one played with a dollhouse. A BUNGALOW dollhouse just doesn’t cut it. And do you know why? Because as the director of the dollhouse family drama you must be able to see into each and every room. Having to turn the damn thing around in a circle to check the rooms, the furniture and the people is just plain wrong. You must maintain vigilant control at all times – you must know what every figure is doing in every room, every second. The story of your dollhouse family will not flow without this constant attention to every detail.

Does this make any kind of sense?

Can you tell I am still a little upset over this?

Really, it was just one of those minor childhood traumas.

I’ll get over it. Eventually.

(But just in case anyone was wondering what to get me for Christmas….)


Shari said...

I can't remember things I wanted for Christmas as a kid. Mostly I got them and broke/lost/got bored with them. Yeah, a little spoiled, though sometimes they were very similar to what I wanted. Now I am going to have think about it. Or I could go call my mom...

That drawing you did is better than any drawing I would have attempted. I wonder if there are miniture dollhouse ornaments? Different, but cool!!

oreneta said...

I too wanted a doll house for Christmas, what was cool though was that my Dad made me one. It was a whole lot rougher than any of those in the pictures, and I had to come up with all the rfurnishings...toothpaste tube caps, those old red ones glued to the top of a bolt make entirely acceptable floor lamps by the was a blast, though mostly I remember making the dolls an furniture more than playing with it. It too was a bungalow, but you could see into everything at once and, how cool is this, the roof was hinged so if things needed serious intervention you could flip it back and really get in there....Who knows Santi Claus may come up with it yet...

Sherry said...

I love laughing to start my day...your word visual, aided by your hand drawn visual gave me quite the picture...believe me, I'm not laughing at your artistic talents Beth..I'm laughing at you having to spin the thing around to play with it. It looks like a Hubble Bubble, like something from the Jetsons!! I'm not surprised the thing "disappeared"...and so totally NOT a doll house.

I had one..made of tin and I can still remember when the "prongs" would pop out in a wall and I'd have to get one of my parents to help me put it back in. The story goes that my dad and the neighbour across the street were up all night (amid much booze I'm sure!) putting the thing together and it drove them mad...especially me coming down stairs constantly and the thing having to be thrown behind the couch!! Ah we've had it so easy...electronics for our boys...simply pop in batteries (right sides in if you remember!).

May you get this wish and all your others granted to you this holiday season!!

Sherry said...

By the way I tagged you this morning for an easy meme which you can do or not, your choice...might be good to save until just before New Year's Eve.....

All Mod Cons said...

Why was Santa your parents? That seems a little odd to me. Unless your parents really ARE Santa & his missus?

megan said...

OK, this is the 573rd time I've heard this story, my dear. You simply must move on. Now. Go buy it for yourself - you sure as hell deserve it!

Attila The Mom said...

Hehehe. We must be sisters under the skin.

I actually have a cabinet full of boxed-up victorian minature furniture I've been collecting for the last 10-15 years for the day the kids are gone and I find the perfect dollhouse. ;-)

They think it's so unfair! LOL

Anonymous said...

You are much too critical of your should not be about how realistic it is it should more be about representation and what it is from inside you that you are longing for. And if that is a round bungalow doll house then so be it. Your little-girl-self expressed that beautifully...

I was in the company of an art therapist recently and learned that there is a lot of wisdom and insight to be learned from our drawings, and that our inner critic needs to be told to take a hike sometimes.

Beth said...

No wonder we both have the same name...I too would just LOVE a doll house!!! I figured I would wait till my kids got out of the house so I could build one myself and not have "little hands" in it all the time.

I love all that little stuff and used to pretend "the Borrowers" lived in my walls!

Nomad said...

Hi Beth!

That is lovely/sad/funny/hilarious/sweet all at the same time!!!

I LOVE your drawing!!!

I concur with Trisha! art Therapist?? Do tell...

Princess Pointful said...

Haha! I was all confused... you got a Winnebago for Christmas?

Mrs. G. said...

Are you telling me that you got a freakin' doll house on wheels? Um correct me if I'm wrong, but isn't a doll house on wheels a doll mobile home? Did you have to park it in a doll trailer park? Beth, this might explain a lot of your problems. Shame on Santa!

Beth said...

I can remember one other thing - Chatty Cathy. She lost her "voice" in about two weeks. Rough childhood. (Not really.)

"Serious intervention." I love it! You totally understand. And a flip-up roof would have helped. A bit.

Yours was made of tin? Interesting. Mine was cheap cardboard!! (But enough about me.)
Boys and toys (as opposed to boy toys) - not all those gifts were easy. Didn't you ever have to put together a hockey net?

So very sorry to have been the one to burst your bubble about the Santa/parent thing. And so close to Christmas...
(Welcome back, buddy!)

I obviously haven't moved on.
(boo hoo)
Prepare yourself for the 574th time on Christmas Day!

Oh, god, we have to meet. We can play Barbies AND with doll houses! (If I get one...)

It is very little girlish, isn't it? Even the furniture. You've got me thinking...

The Borrowers! Loved all those books. And often looked around the house for stuff they might use/borrow...

Caught the sad bit, did you?
And after Trish's comment, I'm beginning to love my drawing too.

princess pointful:
Sorry to confuse you! Despite it being my best effort, it does resemble a Winnebago. Which might have been a great gift - in addition to a real doll house!

Yeah, maybe Santa was trying to tell me something - he thought I was destined for a trailer park. Hah! Fooled him!

Barrie said...

There are some very, very cool dollhouses out there now. Perhaps this will be YOUR year! :) I remember loving my cardboard Barbie dollhouse.

Bec said...

This takes me back... My grandmother made a lovely big dollhouse that we played with all the time.

Yet another (secret) reason to want a little girl ; )

Sherry said...

If Megan has heard this story 573 times she can only be your sister!!!!

Nah, I never had to put the hockey nets together...came in the box delivered from Santa and dad and the boys would put it together Christmas morning. "Mrs. Claus" knows a thing or two!!! ;)

marn said...

Yes, I can imagine your devastation - it's probably right up there with my "joy" of receiving the much longed for "plastic guitar". Were we just not "GOOD" little girls? (you were; I wasn't!)

Diesel said...

Yes, but you have to admit that "bungalow" is an awful lot of fun to say. Let's say it together. "Bungalow." "Bungalowbungalowbungalow."

Whoa, I'm light-headed.

Beth said...

I'm thinking MY year will be the year I finally buy one for myself. To Beth, with love...

Not so "secret" now! And be careful with those wishes - I saved all my paper dolls for the daughter that never arrived!

Yup, Megan is the baby sister.
And you were a brilliant Mrs. Claus.

Oh, my god! Was that the reason? It never occurred to me. We really should have listened to that warning - "He knows if you've been good or bad..."

I can't believe I actually did it - bungalowbunglowbungalow...
If you told me to jump off a cliff, would I?
But I did buy your book! Three copies!

Anonymous said...

I appreciate your drawing because never, ever have I heard of a bungalow doll house. It goes against all the doll house rules of play. I can understand the painful memory!

I hope this year Santa gets you the doll house of your dreams. A huge Victorian one, with tons of furniture. You are never too old for a really good doll house.


Mary said...

Oh no! The Disappointed Christmas. There is really nothing worse . . . except: what if your mother announces on a gorgeous Thursday summer morning that she FORGOT to send you to Brownie Camp on Monday?!! That it was now too late and even though you'd be waiting for Brownie Camp all summer -- she forgot? As in your childhood dreams, the Event, the Experience that gave life meaning, was something your mother could forget? Now, I am totally not traumatized, bitter, or entrenched. But.

cipriano said...

Well, it's a good thing I tuned in to your blog before going shopping, Beth.
See, I WAS going to get you a good ol' conventional dollhouse.
But now that I see your own sketch, I see that my first instincts were right after all.
I am going to go to Toys 'R' Us and get you a doll SPACE-VEHICLE.

Beth said...

"The doll house rules of play."
Like Oreneta, you get it!
Alas, my faith in Santa Claus is now sadly lacking. I'm going to have to rely on Mrs. Claus. (That would be me.)

Okay, that beats my childhood trauma by a mile!
I bet Brown Owl really missed you...

Dear Cip/SANTA:
Please! I've been such a good girl this year. And I'm sorry I insulted your gift from Christmas past with my (sketchy) sketch. I would really, really love to receive a conventional doll house this year.
Do you take bribes? If so, I will leave a hamburger and a Starbucks coffee for you by the Christmas tree.
(Good) Beth

apryl said...

I want that first doll house too! I always wanted a doll house as a little girl, little bath tubs and tiny beds that I could reposition. What great fun!!!

Hopefully one year...

Gary said...

My heart goes out to you over this childhood scar. I wish I could send you the lovely German dollhouse my daughter received from us when she was about 6 years old. Very controllable - 3 stories and everything inside is made of wood, metal and fabric (no plastic).

She is keeping it though :)

Nice drawing - it's what is knows as primitive art - big market for it... (and it's better than I can draw).

Beth said...

So, we're both hoping - but don't wait as long as I have! Give up on Santa and buy one for yourself.

That doll house sounds perfect. If I'd had a daughter, she'd have had a doll house as soon as she could talk. Well, perhaps that would have been a bit early - but I would have happily played with it until she was ready to!
I'm interested in that market for primitive art. I can draw those sketches lickety-split!

oreneta said...

I thought of you today, I was in BCN and came across one of those stores that sells everything you need for one of those doll houses. That is one expensive hobby. I'll take a pic for you if I can find it again

Sornie said...

Just be thankful that it wasn't a doll mobile home. That would be the ultimate way to crush a child's spirit.

Sherry said...

Hey, just having a glass of wine while I try and untangle my tree lights and figure out what is going on this tree and what is not..and knowing I am not going out to shovel that snow (!!!)...wanted to tell you that maybe you should just read "A Doll House" by Ibsen instead!! oooh, bad joke...I know!!! anyway, I just read Ann Patchett's Run...loved it! Thanks for the review and recommend!

Beth said...

Yes, a very expensive hobby. Am I worth it?
I'd love to see some pictures if you ever go back there.

It kind of was a mobile home - with those wheels. I was just too young (thank heavens) to recognize the significance of the "mobility" of that pseudo-doll house.

I've read Ibsen's A Doll House! Big surprise. (The title attracted me.)
Good thing you didn't bother shoveling snow last night - it just keeps on coming!!!

Lainey-Paney said...


I had an amazing dollhouse when I was younger. My grandfather & mother spent HOURS working on grandfather built it...and my mother picked the wallpaper...and carpet....
They made some of the furniture...and stained it a dark, dark brown color...
It was so beautiful. It really was.'s one of the very reasons I need a little girl. Because I will put much effort into building a dollhouse for her....and decorate it...

One thing about my was 3 stories...but only had stairs from the first floor to the second floor. I always pretended that there was an invisible elevator that took the family up to the bathroom & other room on the 3rd floor.

Beth said...

You were one lucky little girl.
Love the bit about the invisible elevator!