Wednesday, November 21, 2007

"Artificial Nookie"


From a recent article in Toronto’s Globe and Mail:

“This month, artificial intelligence expert David Levy released Love + Sex with Robots: The Evolution of Human-Robot Relationships. In the book, he predicts that by 2050, men and women will be enjoying physical and emotional bonds with extremely lifelike, apparently conscious and remarkably suave robots.”

Brave New World. Crazy new world. This is progress?

Personally, I think the prospect of a world where intimate relations with such a robot becomes the norm poses more of a threat to men than women. (I choose not to elaborate…)

So, I’m reading the article and thinking, hey, what if they speed up production and The Robot is available in, say, 5–10 years?

If that happens and anyone hears me asking for a “new doll” for Christmas, do me a favour.

Just shoot me.

24 comments:

Anonymous said...

Too funny. Some things should just be left alone...

Although I would argue that some spouses are already dealing with apparently conscious remarkably suave robots already.

Angel said...

I'll have my nerf pistol loaded and ready for ya!!! ;)

Sherry said...

Ah, this takes the blow up doll to "new heights"...ouchy mamma!!!

Now do you "do the deed" with the robot, or do you program the robots to do the deed together and then you are plugged in and vicariouisly have the pleasure?? A little "zap'll do ya"?!?! Is there something good to be said for knowing I will not be around in 2050?!?

Mrs. G. said...

Well, I'm just sittin over here waiting for you to elaborate...tell me the good stuff. There are so many ways I could go with this comment but I'm go to show some restraint and just let it go.

The Author Of This said...

I'm in. As long as the "female" version of the robot doesn't have a "I'm going to go Psycho afer 4 weeks of the relationship" chip inside it. And if it starts moaning, then you can just turn the fecker off. Bonus! Oooh! And it'll never have a headache!

Mind you, it'd be a real downer if it runs out of battery before you're "finished". What a mood killer.

Beth said...

trish:
"Apparently conscious." Good line!

beth:
A Nerf pistol? That won't do the job! I'm serious here...

sherry:
I gather you "do the deed" with the robot - although voyeurism could be a possibility. Patent the idea!

mrs.g:
Need I elaborate? Truly?
I think I'm going to use some restraint as well.

AMC:
Ah, my male friend, you have set yourself up here...but yet again, I will show some restraint. I won't touch the "finished/batteries" issue but I will ask - do you get that "headache" complaint a lot?
Oh, and I'm assured that the male version comes with a chip that prevents immediate apres deed snoozing.

Kelly said...

That is just too weird! Reminds me of the movie with Hailey Joel Osman.

Shari said...

I wonder if these robots would have preferences, if you know what I mean. I think these robots are best for those who are not into emotional attachment. I better leave this topic before I put my foot in my mouth. (Oh, I just did.)

Still, I think tax dollars should be spent on other things.

Dan said...

Beth, everything is a threat to us men. Or maybe just to me. :)

Lainey-Paney said...

agreed: more of a threat to men than women.

teeeheeeheee!

oreneta said...

Ah the good old days, when it was just an inflatable girly girl....

here's the real question, does it put the toilet seat down, and replace a toilet paper roll when it is finished?

bjkeefe said...

"Just shoot you ... with what?" I am unable to resist asking.

No, no, don't answer. Entirely rhetorical.

Princess Pointful said...

Ha! You are fabulous! Especially your little comment about the gender differences...

Beth said...

my utopia:
Very weird. And I really hope it never happens.

shari:
It is very difficult not to put your foot in your mouth with this kind of topic. Way too much possibility for double entendre...

dan:
Not everything - that's not possible. And surely not to you!

lainey-paney:
Didn't have to elaborate for you!

oreneta:
Alas, those essential skills have not been programmed into the male version! What a terrible design flaw.

brendan:
Brendan, you are bad. That is definitely a rhetorical question.

princess pointful:
Fabulous? More like crazy to have posted such a topic. Hit a few nerves though!

Angela said...

But what if you like your new doll? I don't know, Beth. Maybe I'm a hopeless cynic, but this may not be the world's worst idea. ;) xoxoxoxo

megan said...

I know what type of dolls you like........

Beth said...

angela:
I'm not at the hopeless cynic stage - yet!

megan:
Yes, my dear, you do.
And I know the kind of dolls you like to play with...

TK Kerouac said...

Great Blog, nice to see another Canadian writer.

Gary said...

I saw a TV piece that featured a human-like female robot in Japan - programmed as an office assistant, but I have to say her 'boss' was looking at her with more than professional interest.

Yeah, put my name on the 'shoot me' list too.

Although, I might accept a robot who can cook really well - of any gender. I'm getting tired of my own skills.

Barrie said...

I really just want a robot who chauffeurs the kids, does laundry, cooks, cleans, checks homework. I guess I want a wife! Like me! Ha!!

Beth said...

tk kerouac:
Thanks for visiting my blog - glad you like it.

gary:
That's two definite yes's for the Shoot Me list.
And I'd accept a (gender neutral) robot who can cook well - never mind "really well." Years of cooking have taken their toll - on everyone around here.

barrie:
I think most women do. So why is the research money being spent on "love machines?" Go figure.

PG said...

I read a similar article a few weeks ago. I think it may have even mentioned that possibility of human-robot marriage.

Don't worry - we won't let you get a robot man for xmas.

Beth said...

psychgrad:
You're a sweetheart and I'm smiling because, really, how could you stop me?
(But I won't, I won't...)

Attila the Mom said...

aaaiiighhhhh!!!!