Saturday, October 13, 2007

I Don't Like You - So There


I have never met a nice parking ticket person.

If you are one (a nice one) or know of one, let me know. It might change my jaundiced view of these people.

Yes, I parked illegally while helping my sister move yesterday. I blocked her driveway. There was no where else to park near her house. She wasn’t going anywhere and I had stuff to unload from my car.

When the parking enforcement officer (what an impressive title…) was spotted, I ran outside.

“Excuse me! Please! Hey! Please – I can explain….”

We were just a few feet apart. (Okay, metres. I’m a good Canadian.) She never even turned her head at the sound of my voice. And there was no one else in the vicinity I could have been (politely) shouting to.

And why did she not turn around to acknowledge my cries? Too damn busy keying the pertinent info into her Crackberry/Blackberry Wannabe Parking Ticket machine.

While I explained, she just stared – impassively. Not even a teeny tiny hint of compassion in her expression.

She finally spoke. “The ticket is printing out.”

Well, that shut me up. I got the message. I stared/glared back.

Of course it was printing out - Ms. Busy Fingers!

I wish I’d had the nerve to swear at her. The words heartless bitch come to mind. (Can you get arrested for swearing at a parking official? Can you get another ticket for being pissed off and showing it?)

She was a glum and miserable looking sort – one of those, “No exception to the rules, I’m just doing my job, I do not have a heart,” kind of folk.

So be it. I’m out thirty bucks. But I do have a heart.

And, hey, by the way, lady, you do NOT look cool in your uniform.

Yes, I am still mad. And bitter. And childish.

(The above is a picture of my very own ticket. I erased (poorly) the identifying info – both hers and mine – because $30.00 bucks is enough. I don’t want The Ontario Court of Justice or The City of Toronto on my *ss too.)



32 comments:

JR's Thumbprints said...

Hey, I don't even like writing tickets on prisoners for silly rule infractions. Those parking tickets are money makers.

Sherry said...

Ranting about this is good Beth...get it out...these people have no souls...they are automatons...they put on that suit (I'm still laughing at your diss on her outfit!!) and become "robo-cop"...all in a day's work, all in how many tickets I can crank out..and remember, the city needs to find some extra money...honestly? I'd fight it...just on principle. Yes it was "illegal", but you weren't parking there for pleasure, you were parking to unload in the only spot available. Just my 2 cents...I'd be mad as a hatter myself. There you were doing a good deed for someone else and you get that...something wrong with this picture!! Have some of your favourite coffee and relax today...and I'm LOL about not wanting to have anyone else on your a** for printing their information!!! :)

Casdok said...

Its a power trip for them??
I can understand your feelings!

(and thank you for the hugs, think you need one as well!)

megan said...

Give it to me. It is my responsibility. There's no way you are paying good money for helping me. It's not fair.

bjkeefe said...

In defense of Lovely Rita, imagine what that job must be like: an all day long grind of completely mindless and soul-killing drudgery. The only interaction with people is getting yelled at. There is probably a quota to be met, so back at the home office, there is nothing but a micromanaging bean counter for a boss, and a room full of co-workers who don't consider you a "real cop."

That said, I got a ticket on my own street last night, for parking in front of my own house.

That bitch.

The Author Of This said...

Oops. That's all I'm going to say on this one! I'll leave it for a post of my own I think...might be safer!

PG said...

If it makes you feel any better...I'm guessing that if someone with a lot of empathy or much of a heart became a parking enforcement officer, they would either have to suppress it quickly, quit or get fired (for not meeting quotas).

Beth said...

jr:
Yup and I think it's meet the quota time in Toronto! One of my sons also got a parking ticket last night. (They can leave us alone now...)

sherry:
Yes, the rant felt good - childish as it was. I'm okay (sort of) paying a parking ticket under normal circumstances but just felt a little understanding might have applied here.

casdok:
For sure, I'm thinking a bit of a power trip was happening. Even a simple, "I'm sorry, it's too late," might have helped.

megan:
Done. Paid for. Not your responsibility, kiddo.
But let's fight about it, okay?
Is tomorrow good for you?

brendan:
You were starting to make me feel a wee bit of sympathy for Lovely Rita for a second there - and then I just laughed out loud!
My sympathies.

all mod cons:
You've left me in suspense. Were you a parking ticket enforcer in a former life? A nice one?

psychgrad:
Good point - and that would explain why I don't happen to have any parking ticket enforcers as friends.
(But I don't feel that much better.)

The Author Of This said...

God no, nothing like that! I don't think the uniform would suit me. Although I think I've got the personality, I can be a right grumpy fecker!

Gary said...

Don't hold back now :)

It has to be a horrible job, although in the small city of Nelson, where I live, there are only two of them and most of us know both of them. They still dish out the tickets, but they engage in conversation, smile and even wait if you're running and hollering.

Not to mention if you pay right away, a ticket is eight bucks...

Pendullum said...

I can tell you are a c'nd'n eh....
And I think I can help u with this....
I hate those ticket people and you are bang on the money with your discription....
But I know for a fact that most do not realize that there is always a
standing zone... and you were not parked... you were unloading your sister and her stuff...
thereby you were standing...
not parked...
big difference... So there parking slip person... blow that where the sun don't shine!!!!

Attila the Mom said...

Ow!

Anonymous said...

It's the uniforms, it gives them a feeling of power, and with that power comes that stupid ticket machine, that prints on the spot. It is almost like they are stepford parking ticket enforcers. Not human emotions, no empathy, no ....nothing.
Sorry you got the ticket! I hate tickets, especially when you were right there to explain.
I would be really mad too!!

Beth said...

all mod cons:
I just can't imagine you being a "right grumpy fecker" all day long!

gary:
$8.00??? I could have toned down my rant for that amount! (Although the injustice of it all would have still rankled.)
And so there are some nice parking ticket in the world...

pendullum:
Your excellent advice came too late. I paid the damn thing. Next time (god forbid) - less whining, more quick thinking.

attila:
Big "Ow!"

eileen:
Yes, she would fit nicely in the town of Stepford - or a Stephen King movie!
(I'm still being childish and mean..)

Cipriano said...

Yeah, Beth. Totally wrong on so many levels, what this Enforcement Wench was doing.
I wonder if it illegal to throw eggs at the Enforcement-Mobile© as it leaves?
-- Cip

Beth said...

cip:
"Wench." Good word. I like it.
As for the eggs, you try it first (if and when you ever get dinged with a parking ticket). Let me know.

Shari said...

I got a parking ticking for parking in front of my house overnight. :( I was supposed to be parked on the other side of the street. :(

Once, my neighbor rang the doorbell to tell me that he saw the meter maid chalking my tire. I moved it to the driveway.

I don't have to worry about that anymore. I don't drive.

But it does suck. You feel stupid. It's thirty bucks here, too.

There was an article in the paper a few years ago about the meter maid-how she talks people, sometimes putting in a nickle or a dime in for them. Some people live in areas where they only have off street parking available. She lets them off once, but if she sees the car there again, no more chances. I guess after awhile, these "meter maids" heard it all, just doing their job, and deal with worse than a glare.

Beth said...

shari:
Another nice meter maid! I'll have to change my tune/attitude.
Some day. Not right now.
We have to play, "Quick, move the cars - the chalk guy is here," on this street too.

Anonymous said...

I hate getting parking tickets - esp when they are from glorified meter maids....at least it's only thrity bucks...

Shari said...

I just tagged you. I hope you don't mind. It's on the other blog.

Princess Pointful said...

As if "the ticket is printing" is a good excuse. It is your sister's damn driverway... if she doesn't care, why should Meter Maid?
Boooo

Beth said...

princess pointful:
I like the way you think. That was my logic/explanation to the "enforcer."
Too bad she didn't see it our way.

Angela said...

Arg. That sucks. And I agree. Ranting is good. As my now eight-year-old told me last night, if she keeps her feelings inside they end up exploding out of her later in a mean way. :) She's a smart one, that kid. And so are you!

Beth said...

angela:
Out of the mouths of babes!

Unknown said...

I have no idea why, but I am absolutely paranoid about getting a parking ticket. It's terrible. But then, in Charleston, I realized that it was cheaper to get a parking ticket than it was to park in one of the city's garages.

Beth said...

dorky dad:
It's probably cheaper here too to get the parking ticket than to pay for parking, but then I'm paranoid about that threat of having your car towed away!

Anonymous said...

I'm sorry you got a ticket. I got one today, which is why I came upon your blog. I think there's a special place in hell for them.
I just went on a rant of my own. My coworkers are laughing.

Who takes that job? what kind of person wants a job where they piss off an entire quadrant of a city all by their lonesome every day. The ones here in calgary are all either 90 years old, or so fat they can barely get through a doorway propery. Amazing really with all that walking.

Theres a special place in hell for them.

Beth said...

luke:
You have my sympathy!

Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.