Sunday, June 24, 2007


The above image? It’s true.

I swear, curse, have a temper and if you cross a line with me, you will (eventually) know it. Maybe not right away – but you will know.

Why am I writing about this?

Yesterday I was called “sweetie” by two people. Basically strangers.

This label has haunted me my entire life. I get both “sweet” and “nice” all the time.

Obviously, something I do, say (or look like?) gives this impression – and I know people mean well.

But it kind of makes me feel like a Jekyll and Hyde.

I equate “nice” with “sap,” “pushover” and “wimp.” I am none of these.

Beneath these still, “nice” waters lurks an evil woman. (Okay, how about a “not-so-nice” woman?)

Just so ya know.

You can call me sweet – just don’t mess with me.


Mike M said...

Guys can be soooooo stupid!! They don't even know why they say it. It's like they think you will like it.

They are just works spoken by dim wits. Don't trouble yourself with these dumba**es. They are a waste of air.

Beth said...

To be honest, yesterday it wasn't guys who called me "sweetie" - although men do it too.
Interesting that you got that impression.

Megan said...

You can rant and rave all you want, but the truth is that you are an exceptionally 'good' person, and sometimes people just use the first/most common word (the dreaded 'nice'). Get over it princess, live with it, move on. There are worse things to be called....And ya don't scare me - I can mess with you all I want!!!

Beth said...

I don't wanna be "good!"
But I do like "Princess!"
(Doesn't really work for me though, does it?)

The Guy Who Writes This said...

Beth, don't fear, people think I'm smart because I have a professorial look about me, and I often disprove that theory. Maybe you should go out and get arrested.

oreneta said...

In Catalan, and I am pretty sure Spanish they use 'simpatica' which basically means very likable, and sypathetic and you just sort of really enjoy them,and I don't think implies that you are a pushover, wimpy, soft or wet, for which they use 'bleda'(sp?) which means chard, as in Swiss, apparently this gets all weak and droops and looks sad and pathetic at the mearest instance.

next time someone says your sweet, correct them, I think you're probably simpatica.

Beth said...

Drunk and disorderly? Solicitation? Assaulting an officer?
I'm giving this arrest idea some serious thought.

Simpatica. I like it - I could live with that.
"Bleda?" No way.

Nomad said...

So funny,

I would kill for nice...I fear I am too often alot of other things
(having my foot in my mouth it seems alot of the time...or shouting at my kids...)
I would love for this to be my default...

But I hear ya, I would not mind sweetie so much...

But don't let anyone ever...ever...I said EVER call me MA'AM....

(But you REALLY do sound like a very sweet and kind person!!!)

That's good no?

Can you write about your alter ego for us?

Beth said...

I'll bet you are nice - hey, you're nice to me!
I'm afraid to write about my alter ego, the real me....might scare away my audience.
(I shout at my kids, too - always have - but the older they get, the less shouting required. A LOOK will do the trick now.)

adrienne said...

People (generally old ladies and people who are trying to patronize me) call me sweetie, too. I bristle every time. Honey, too. These people don't know me. I'm a total bitch.

Mom of Three said...

I am short, and also was "cute" rather than pretty back in the day, drive a mini-van and have three little kids, so people naturally assume I'm someone I'm not. Woe to them when they find out I can cuss better than Ozzy.

Beth said...

ooooh!1 I love it! I love to find out that there is an ornery streak in people who don't look it!!!

I will try not to make you mad!!!

Beth said...

Apparently, we both give off the sweet and nice vibes - but what lies beneath? Bitches! Yes!

Appearances are deceiving - for sure.
Looks like we keep our cussing to a minimum on our blogs. Of course, it's not usually called for while blogging. It's the rest of life...

Bet you couldn't make me mad!
And, oh yeah, I definitely have an ornery streak

Mike M said...

A girl(s) called you sweetie????

Beth said...

They were women - although young girls will describe me as sweet.
As in, "You're Mom's so sweet." (Yeah, right.)

Mamma said...

Funny, I always wished people would think I was sweet. I've been tall and mouthy my whole life. I think people expect when something "honest" is going to be said, it will be said by me.

You'd think I'd learn to shut my mouth.

Dorky Dad said...

OOOOOOOHHHH, you're such a sweetie! I just want to pinch your little cheeks! ;)

Beth said...

I'm thinking it might be refreshing to be totally honest, to say what's on my mind. Reveal the REAL me. (Too late to change?)

dorky dad:
OMG - you hit another nerve! I used to get "chubby cheeks" as a kid - with a lot of pinching by older ladies.

Anonymous said...

I laughed when I read this! I get this all the time. My best friends say, "people think your so sweet, if they only knew..." I resent that too. It implies I am a phoney. I am not. I just treat people with respect, unless they disrespect me or get nasty or f***k with me and I can be not sweet at all. I hate the implication that people think I am a push over and have often shocked people at work, when a person has crossed the line, and I had to be not so sweet. Did not mean to ramble, but this really touched a nerve! Good post!

Beth said...

You've got a great perspective on this "sweetness" phenomenon.
Be sweet and kind when possible - let it rip when it's called for.
Good lesson for me.

Anonymous said...

Being 'sweet' is nothing more than giving people the benefit of the doubt and treating them with the respect that you yourself would like. Of course if that is dismissed or ignored or taken advantage of then one has to resort to plan B.

Beth said...

I guess I will always remain "sweet" - because it can be a good thing.

But I'm becoming more open to Plan B.

Diesel said...

Well, dammit, I think you're sweet and you're just going to have to deal with it.

I didn't piss you off, did I? (crosses fingers)

Beth said...


Be very afraid...

patricia said...

Ha ha! I'll be sure never to call you any of those nasty words! I should get you this hilarious magnet that my sister-in-law gave me for my birthday a while back. It's got a pic of one of those ladies from the 50s, and she's asking the question:

'Are you a good bitch or a bad bitch?'

Beth said...


"Good bitch or bad bitch?"
If it's possible, I think I'm a little bit of both!

Pendullum said...

A soul sista found...

Beth said...

You can never have too many sisters...