Sunday, November 26, 2006

Things I Never Knew

This list may have come your way via e-mail but there’s no way it could have had my two cents thrown in along with it. Do my “two cents” make it worth looking over again? Maybe.

Anyway, I’m brain dead today so nothing better is going to appear on this site. If you choose to continue reading, let me know if any of the following is BS. (And I mean the “facts” on the list — not my comments.)

In the 1400's a law was set forth in England that a man was allowed to beat his wife with a stick no thicker than his thumb. Hence we have "the rule of thumb."

(I am never going to use that expression again.)

Many years ago in Scotland, a new game was invented. It was ruled "Gentlemen Only...Ladies Forbidden." Thus the word GOLF entered into the English language.

(Another sexist, anti-woman tidbit. I don’t play golf. My apologies to those who do but I’ve come up with another name for the game. Let’s call it “Triple B” — Boring Beyond Belief.)

The first couple to be shown in bed together on prime time TV were Fred and Wilma Flintstone.

(I remember that bed. At that time, I was too innocent to wonder how Fred and Wilma “did it” on a slab of rock. Poor Wilma.)

Men can read smaller print than women can; women can hear better.

(Well, I’m quite capable of reading read fine print with my glasses but I don’t foresee my husband — or males in general — wearing hearing aids to improve their hearing. In fact, I suspect their hearing impairment is selective.)

It is impossible to lick your elbow.

(I confess. I tried. This fact is true.)

The cost of raising a medium-size dog to the age of eleven: $6,400

(Is that figure in U.S. dollars? And what about a large dog? Major, my dear, sweet mutt, it’s a good thing we love you dearly. And you’re only ten.)

Intelligent people have more zinc and copper in their hair.

(I don’t know how to test this one. I’m going to assume I have tons of zinc and copper in my hair. I think that’s the only “intelligent” thing to do.)

Each king in a deck of playing cards represents a great king from history:
Spades - King David
Hearts - Charlemagne
Clubs -Alexander, the Great
Diamonds - Julius Caesar

(I like this one. As a history buff, I find it fascinating. Next time I play cards, I’m going to look closely at the faces of these guys. But what about the Queens? Didn’t anyone check this out? What are they — chopped liver?)

111,111,111 x 111,111,111 = 12,345,678,987,654,321

(As a mathematical dunce, I’m going to take this one on faith. I’m not even getting out my calculator.)

If a statue in the park of a person on a horse has both front legs in the air, the person died in battle. If the horse has one front leg in the air, the person died as a result of wounds received in battle. If the horse has all four legs on the ground, the person died of natural causes.

(This one just makes me sad.)

Q. What do bulletproof vests, fire escapes, windshield wipers, and laser printers all have in common?
A. All were invented by women.

(Yes! Finally one to celebrate the brilliance of women. And don’t tell me it isn’t true. I need this one.)

In Shakespeare's time, mattresses were secured on bed frames by ropes. When you pulled on the ropes the mattress tightened, making the bed firmer to sleep on. Hence the phrase......... "goodnight, sleep tight."

(What about, “And don’t let the bedbugs bite?”)

It was the accepted practice in Babylon 4,000 years ago that for a month after the wedding, the bride's father would supply his son-in-law with all the mead he could drink. Mead is a honey beer and because their calendar was lunar based, this period was called the honey month, which we know today as the honeymoon.

(It’s the bride who needed the mead/honey beer. And not just for a month.)

I’m not feeling so brain dead anymore. At times, you just need a little something like this to rev up the brain cells — or a piece of leftover chocolate birthday cake for breakfast. One tiny slice should give me a “chocolate high.” No one will even notice it’s missing.

1 comment:

Trish said...

Some of these I knew already...but those inventions by women? I love it!