Saturday, January 30, 2010

Ready (?), Set, Go...

Cautiously testing the waters of the blogging pool because I may be tempting fate or the gods or whatever by returning now. I suspect something (else) is going to happen which shall yank me right back out of the water…

One of the things prompting my return is a conversation I had with a friend last week. He told me I was angry.

“Angry? Sad, frustrated and overwhelmed, yes, but angry? I don’t think so.”

“You’re angry, “ he insisted. “I can hear it in your voice and see it in your eyes.”

And with that revelation, I realized it was time to take back control of my life – or as much of it as I possibly can right now. It’s so easy to lose sight of your own needs when caught up in the needs and lives of others.

On a lighter note – some possible future posts?

Beth the Oblivious gets hit-on at the grocery store, how to forgive your hairdresser for giving you a little Dutch boy hair-cut, why expressing road rage at a four-way stop is not a good idea…

We’ll see what I can do.

P.S. I’ve noted both the absence of or decrease in posting by others in the blogging world. Perhaps it’s not April but January that is the cruelest month??

photo credit:


Sherry said...

The sun just came out at 6:40 pm -- you're back!!! :)

Angry? Well, I didn't hear anger in your voice (haven't seen your face though!)...but you don't seem angry to me as much as frustrated, tired, sad, emotionally wrung out...

Testing the waters is a good still have that sense of humour which is a very good thing!!

The Bodhi Chicklet said...

Well hello you! Perhaps we can help quell some of that anger in you, if there is in fact any. Please do tell all - share some thoughts and we'll help you along.

The Bodhi Chicklet said...

P.S. To give you a smile - my security word was "botorks" - try saying it out loud.

Deidra said...

I'm so glad to see you back! I came home from an afternoon out with my husband, and there you were at the top of my list again! What joy! As for anger...I think it's usually a "surface emotion." Usually, for me, there's something more I find if I just dig a bit below the surface. Frustration, sadness, weariness or some other more elusive emotion may be trying to get noticed. Either way, I'm glad you're here again. I've missed you.

Maggie May said...

i'm glad your toe is here.

Angie Muresan said...

I am glad you're back, Beth. Whether you believe it or not, the blogging world needs you. I hope you found a place for your mom.

Zhu said...

I also noticed that many bloggers seem to be away (i.e. not posting) lately !

There is nothing wrong with being angry as long as you understand why and can deal with it.

Gary said...

Things ebb and flow...even blogs. We'll be here when you are.

Seraphine said...

yay bethica!
there's no discernable benefit to personal anger, as near as i can tell. it's an appropriate emotion at times, but carrying around anger isn't good for your soul or your health.
so dip your toe back in the blogging world, please!
there's a lot of positive energy coming your way.

cjir1 said...

hello,have a nice day

oreneta said...

Hi hon, so nice to hear you back again...glad you have had a calmer moment in real life....angry. I can see how that might happen...glad to hear your working on it though. It isn't the happiest place to be as a default setting.

Beth said...

Thank God for the sense of humour!
We’ll have to rectify that not having seen my face lately – and my not seeing yours.

The Bodhi Chicklet:
Just reading these comments has been a help.
P.S. Said it aloud – and smiled. :)

Strangely enough, it was the anger I’d buried.
Glad to be back – (one of) the steps in the right direction!

Maggie May:
So is my toe – and the rest of me.

Thank you for your kind words – and things are going as best they can re: my mom.

Acknowledging the existence of the anger was a good first step…

One would think I’d realize that “ebb and flow” thing by now. Always learning (or re-learning…)

Angry at the world? At myself? Either one – not good.
That positive energy helps. :)

Will do.

And it’s not a familiar default setting for me – perhaps that’s why it came as a revelation?
Good to be back.

Laura said...

Welcome back. I hope you didn't do a literal dipping, it's so darn cold!

So anger is something bad and the other emotions are good? I think a well-rounded person (here I mean figuratively) is one who can express (well, maybe not at a stop sign) the range of emotions. What do we have them for if not to express and experience them?

Barrie said...

So glad to see you!!!

msb said...

You will always be needed by others but you are right, it is time to consider your own needs. Thanks,though, for being there for me. I can't imagine what I would do without you.

laughingwolf said...

bto is beth the oblivious? alla time i thunk twere bachman turner overdrive! :O lol

Attila The Mom said...

I think we're recovering from all that nog over the holidays. ;-)

Bee said...

Oh, January is definitely the cruelest month. Or November.

I've never understood why Eliot was thinking April . . . but something to do with those tubers and snow. Maybe anger has something to do with it? You think you are making a fresh start (green shoots) and then the frost gets you.

I've been thinking of you a lot. It made me so happy to see your comment on my blog today. xx

laughingwolf said...

hey, us canuckleheads, and a few alaskans, know all about FEBRRRRRRUARY! lol

trish said...

Testing the waters . . . ah yes, me too.

As for 'angry' - somehow you don't come across as angry. Perhaps your friend was projecting something he thought should be there?

looking forward to hearing about the Dutch boy hair cut. No matter what kind of style I ask for, my hair always turns out looking like that too.

VE said...

No lack of posting at my blog! There's plenty of nonsense for everyone.

I definitely want to hear about the guy hitting on you in the grocery store. Was he a handy man?

Rick said...

Most of us are missing-in action (writing!) but soon to be back...

Scarlett said...

I cared for my Mum for 5 yrs, Altziemers 4yrs @ home and 1yr in a nursing home,then after a emergency visit for something else they discovered she had Cancer and she passed in 2 weeks. I was devistated and will miss her forever.
Anger was my middle name all that time, I hid it well, but felt it deeply, it took me a couple of years to let it go. It's funny, people say they didn't know I was angry, just thought I was tired, frustrated & sad.

Keep writing, I love reading your thoughts & I bet they help you through your difficult times.

Beth said...

Thank you for sharing, for understanding and for your kind words.