I recently hosted a party which had to be the shortest one on record. It lasted for all of 10 minutes and there was only one person in attendance. Me.
It was a god-damned PITY PARTY held in honour of my disintegrating body. I figure at the rate things are falling apart, it’s just a matter of years before I’ll need a total overhaul. Would that such a thing existed.
What prompted this not-so-festive occasion? I’m waiting for the test results regarding my bruised and sore left foot. Tentative diagnosis? Stress fracture. The disconcerting thing about such a fracture is that it can happen without you being aware of it. Which I wasn’t. If it is. This adds insult to injury.
While a stress fracture is a common occurrence among runners, I most definitely did not do it pounding the pavement. These days, only some kind of emergency prompting an adrenalin rush gets me moving at any speed beyond a brisk walking pace.
The pity party was short-lived in part because I refuse to feel sorry for myself. I really, really hate doing that. Also, acknowledging that my nagging ailments are minor compared to those of others’ also put an end to my “whaa…whaa…” moment. With a shake of my head and a kick in the pants (hard to do on your own) the party was over. Finis.
While I can still walk, talk, dance (albeit with a bit of a gimpy foot) and laugh, I am OKAY. Better than okay. I am kick-ass (see above) fine.
P.S. But I also have a paper cut on my right middle finger. Hurts something fierce.
17 comments:
I'm sorry I'm laughing. I really am. Over that paragraph that describes how and why you would actually run. I've got this visual...
Anyway, I believe a pity party is never a bad thing. I do however believe that all pity parties must be short lived with a non-existent guest list. So you've done well.
Girlfriend, if we never took those moments to feel down, sad and worried about ourselves...our sagging this and our aching that...how would we ever understand compassion and empathy? How would we be able to offer anything to others?
Sending you positive, good thoughts about the results of the test!! ♥
Pity parties are one of life's necessities. I believe yours lasted just the right amount of time!
Oh ow. Ow. Ow. Did you at least get to eat some cheesy poofs? LOL
Hope your footie is better soon!
paper cuts suck!!! they can be the worst...but a stress fracture aint nuthin to sneezw at either. I hope you're ok girlfriend....and no more pity parties!!!!!
XOXOXOXOXOX
A 'kick in the pants' and you are 'kick ass'... so that's where the stess fracture came from. Stop kicking butt sweetie! Uh hum on a somber note, I am very sorry to hear you are incapacitated, never fun.
There is something about this post that is the very essence of your particular lovableness, Beth.
Sherry lee:
You’re not sorry for laughing AT ALL! And for that, I’m inviting you to my next pity party.
Bring a gift. Please?
Deidre:
Yes, they do happen. Must keep them short – and to the point.
Attila:
How did you know I always serve cheese poofs (“cheeesies”) at parties?!
Beth:
Once in awhile is okay, right? ;)
St. Jude:
I will never stop (figuratively speaking) kicking butt. But I’m being careful with that foot of mine.
Bee:
That is such a sweet thing to say – and now I’m going to read over my post and look for that lovableness. ;)
Hope you heal quickly!
Your post made me laugh and share your pain.
I admire your attitude. YOU'RE FIERCE!
oh damn i'm sorry. stress fractures suck. my husband had one two years ago and it was a pain in the ...foot. oh i'm sorry! i couldn't help it!
Hilarious, indeed. I hope your foot heals fast. I, for one, have pity parties daily. It's something of a hobby. ;)
Work safety groups want people to report paper cuts. Seems they are a real obstacle to work...
Turns out you have a stress facture eh? Weird....
"Kick ass fine"...I like it! But I feel put out...a party and I wasn't even invited.
Pity Party's are needed from time to time. Good for the soul, as long as they are not to long.
Sorry to hear about the stress fracture. Those can be very painful, sounds like some rest is in order. No Ms. Fix It for a while.
Take care of yourself and listen to your body. Feel better....XXXXX
Hee, hee, you had me there at first. I got a stress fracture once after I jumped off some stairs, fifth or sixth one up. Don't know what got into me. Onto concrete too. Brilliant. Didn't limp for more than a day at least.
I agree with you on the self pity thing. Hate it. Pity from others I can't stand either. Feels awful, like a wet, smelly blanket they're trying to throw over me.
I recommend chocolate ice cream for the paper cut. Best thing for it.
AWESOME!!!! This was so great! I love the idea with the photos of balloons and everything you wrote. Great post!
Feel better soon!!
Ouch!
Love your sense of humor though.
Recently, one of my knee was really painful. Being a bit paranoid about knee injuries, I went to the walk-in-clinic (limping, but never mind).
The doc said it was something called tibalis (?). Not actually the knee but a knot in my muscles below. He called in the "marathoner injury"... before looking at me of a second and correcting himself, saying it could also be triggered by the humid the weather.
I was almost offended.
But yeah, I don't look like a runner...
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