Sunday, March 15, 2009
I had two sort of essential tasks to accomplish on Saturday.
How can a task be sort of essential? Well, if it’s buying a bathing suit, no matter how essential or urgent the need for this item might be, the completion of this particular task is never a sure thing.
My need is definitely urgent. My bathing suit is on the verge of disintegrating from being subjected to chlorine in my hydrotherapy class. Seams are threatening to give way, the elasticity is just about shot and the now barely attached lining is floating out beyond its boundaries (had to tuck a wayward piece back below the bra line last Thursday). Both the suit and I are a disaster waiting to happen – we are at risk of (literally) becoming the butt of a bad joke in class.
And did I manage to purchase a new bathing suit? NO! I hated every one I tried on and they hated me.
Why don’t stores use dim lights in those dressing rooms and have mirrors that provide a soft focus (blurred) reflection? I’m willing to be fooled. Just once I’d like to look at myself in that mirror and say, “Wow, this bathing suit fits perfectly! My God, it makes me look good!” (So what if it doesn’t when I get home? At least I’d have one.) I’m further stymied by my lack of patience. I’ll try on four bathing suits – max – before giving up in fury and frustration.
And how come I look better in a bra and underwear than I do in some of these bathing suits? I’ll tell you why – I figured it out. The material & elastic in some suits contorts, squeezes and rearranges your flesh into places it was never meant to be. Hello!! My boobs belong here, not up there…and that is not where my thighs meet my derrière. It is not appropriate to reveal one’s a** in pool class.
Or, you have the option of trying on a bathing suit made of the flimsiest material ever. I don’t do flimsy.
The worst of it is I still need a damned bathing suit. The few others I possess are not going to be immersed in chlorine. I like them. They fit. They are sacred.
As for my other Saturday task? Success! Writing and printing supplies at Staples. Love that store – can always find what I need – and more. It all fits.